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I reside in Cleveland with my 2 sons, 2 dogs, 2 cats and some fish...all were rescued from unfit living conditions. Just the pets ..not the kids.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

The People of WalMart~OMG


Okay.... I can't help it, these are too funny!

You have to get there early if you want a good seat!
Please let that be mud......
I bet the fat kid is getting more cake....
Ask all King's horses and all the King's men .....why did they put her back together again?!

In these economic times, even the Walmart smiley face needs a second job!
Here is the ringleader of the circus known as Walmart!
"Does this outfit make me look fat?"
Stop shopping in the skinny girl section!

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Litttle Things to Make Life More Interesting

1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."

3. Specify that your drive-through order is "TO-GO."

4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."

7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."

8. Practice making fax and modem noises.

9. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them to your boss.

10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."

12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.

13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it
that way."

16. Staple pages in the middle of the page.

17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking noise.

18. Honk and wave to strangers.

19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.

20. TYPE IN UPPERCASE.

21. type only in lowercase.

22. dont use any punctuation either

23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.

24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.

"DO YOU HEAR THAT?"
"What?"
"Never mind, it's gone now."

25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

26. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.

27. Ask people what gender they are.

28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.

29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

30. Sing along at the opera.

31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

32. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter
something about "psychological profiles."

Walmart's Real Customers - Gotta love these!



Who are you again? Oh never mind....                                    Texas

Damn girl, just because it’s Halloween doesn’t mean you gotta trick everyone by
letting your treats hang out.


Respect & Class Thanks For Showing Us That You’re An Ass…………..on a side note, why is Ain’t highlighted?                                              Arizona

I don't even want to know how he knows.....                   Ohio
 

This isn’t prison buddy, you don’t have to hang on to her. Trust me, no one is thinking about stealing her from you.                            Virginia

He was just killing time while his supermodel girlfriend was shopping. I’m just kidding,
his mom kicked him out of the basement to go make real friends because all he did was play
World of Warcraft all day.


It looks as if Donald Trump and John Daly morphed into one big creepy being.
Nevada


Why do people feel the need to be so mean to their shorts? Being a pair of gray sweat shorts is embarrassing enough, no need to humiliate them in public like that.
Ohio

Did she pass the inspection?   Michigan

Is anyone else absolutely shocked that there would be wrestling outside of a Walmart? I guess the parking lot wasn’t big enough for  NASCAR. event.
Tennesse
 

The only way this could be more creepy was if one of them had their pants off.
Pennsylvania

Technically those suspenders are working. You don’t normally see them used with jean shorts. Of course I usually don’t see a belly apron just hanging out to say “hi” either.
Virginia
 
He is wearing… a trash bag… as a skirt. I can’t even fathom a reason why!  Oklahoma